I feel lonely, can anyone help?

Yes. Loneliness is a very human feeling, and many people go through it at some point, even with people around them. A counsellor gives you regular time with someone who listens without judging, and can help you understand what is behind the feeling and what small steps might help. Coaches and group activities such as yoga classes can help you build connection too, and if the loneliness comes with low mood that will not lift, it is worth seeing your GP.

What loneliness is, and what it is not

Loneliness is the feeling of having less connection than you would like. It is different from being alone, and you can feel it in a crowd, in a relationship or at work. It often follows a change such as a move, a bereavement, a break-up, retirement, a new baby or working from home. It is not a character flaw, and it is nothing to be ashamed of.

How a counsellor can help

• Time that is just for you. Someone gives you their full attention, which can be a relief if you have not had that for a while.
• Understanding what is underneath. Is it a loss, shyness, a fear of being a burden, or a life that has changed shape?
• Looking at what gets in the way. Some people find that worries about being judged make reaching out feel risky.
• Small next steps. A message to an old friend, a class, a volunteering role, at a pace that feels manageable.

What a first session is like

Sessions usually last 50 minutes to an hour, in person, by video or by phone. You talk about what has been happening and what you would like to be different, and your counsellor listens and asks gentle questions. You choose how much to share. Many people book a free first chat to see whether they feel comfortable with someone, and that feeling matters more than anything else.

Other people who can help

• Coaches are useful if you want practical help building a social life, changing your routine or finding your confidence again.
• Group classes such as gentle yoga or movement can put you in a room with friendly people each week, with no pressure to talk.
• Community groups like walking clubs, choirs, libraries and volunteering often cost little or nothing.

How many sessions, and roughly what it costs

Many people have six to twelve weekly sessions, and some carry on longer or stop sooner. Your counsellor should talk through a plan with you. Private counselling in the UK commonly costs from £45 a session, and often more in big cities. Some counsellors offer lower-cost places, and many offer a free first chat. Check the length of a session and the cancellation terms before you book.

Where it fits alongside NHS care, and when to see your GP

The NHS offers talking therapies, often with self-referral, and your GP can point you to local support. Counselling can sit alongside that, and you can tell your GP about it. Please see your GP if you have felt low for more than a couple of weeks, if you are sleeping or eating very differently, if you have lost interest in things you usually enjoy, or if you are under a mental health team. Please don't stop or change any treatment because of a session. A good counsellor will tell you if another route is better first.

If you need to talk to someone now

• Samaritans on 116 123: free, any time, day or night. You do not have to be suicidal to call.
• NHS 111 for urgent help with your mental health.
• 999 or A&E if you or someone else is in danger.

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